To All on the Ten Tec Reflector,
I have read the recent postings about the Orion 2 software upgrade, the OMNI
VII and even the new Elecraft K3. Itâs the search for the perfect rig.
So, Iâve got to come clean.
Iâve invented it.
The amazing thing about my new rig is that itâs the only one on the market
you can use on a dead band. Yes, using the super sensitive built-in
recorder/playback system (optional at $328.94), it plays back your favorite DX
contacts from years ago even though the bands are now deader than John
Wayneâs acting style.
Not only does my new design provide wide frequency radio reception, it also
includes a digital TV screen/receiver system(cable and satellite ready), laptop
computer, police and fire scanner, and remote microphones to monitor bedrooms
and garage, as well as a state of the art, super-sensitive sensor to monitor
cat litter pan methane levels. (This optional package is yours at $453.23 in
the Continental USA, slightly higher in New Jersey, New York and other foreign
countries.)
Best of all, the rig comes with Refreshment Options. If you get stressed out
regarding some feature of the rig you deem less than perfect, kick back with
the built-in beer dispenser (Optional at $343.01). After youâve had a
couple, that clicking relay you think you hear just wonât matter anymore.
Or if you nod off listening to dead band static as most of us are these days,
wake up with the built-in coffee dispenser (Optional at $1.32). Sleep in front
of your rig all night and get a java jolt first thing the next morning so you
can get to the office bright and perky to brag about your latest ham radio
appliance.
This is the perfect rig for the international market. We have pioneered a new
technology called âDiversity Morse Code.â Yes, you can now hear morse code
in English, German, Japanese, Chinese or even California Valley Girl Language,
all translated automatically for your geographic location. Youâve never
heard dits and dots like this!!!
(Iâve got my morse code set for a Southern accent, yâall.)
Finally, for you DX policemen, thereâs a set of prerecorded messages
(Optional at $6.09) to keep the bands pure. Choose one or all from âUp 5,
Ummm...No Make that 4,â âWait Until He Asks for Calls,â âHeâs Going
QRT,â âLid,â and a barking dog for those of you who often leave your vox
on while fido is in the room.
Youâre gonna love it,
Rick
WO8L
North Carolina
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